you know if you cry in the shower you can almost pretend you aren't doing so at all. like that song about crying in the rain... i forget who by... but our record player broke and we got rid of it, and now we can't play that record any more. which is a shame, i liked that song.
i don't think crying helps with revision though.
look at all that freedom now webster's out of the way! "glories like glow worms afar off shine bright, but looked to near have neither heat, nor light".
"The robin redbreast and nightingale
Never live long in cages"
.........perhaps if i can just be nice. i must be nice, and turn off that spiteful voice in my head. being nasty will only increase the problem...... its so hard to be nice when it hurts.
i must be nice.
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I received an email recently from a dear one, it wasn't ignored but I just needed time to ponder its troubling contents. It made me feel sad for a friend seemingly caged by three days of the long-gone past, and subsequent incomprehensible and even contradictory promises that found no substance in proximity.
It has been said, when it is all said and done a lot more is said than done. Was it ultimately found that the glowing afar-off light had no source or substance? And, could it be that the precious little bird has now flown the coup?
The past stands, it cannot be revised. But the future is open to being shaped by our decisions; decisions, it is hoped, which are shaped by the past and the wisdom learned as we walked along new and even difficult ways. We do need a map, though, and we can then be confident. PP has blogged on this just yesterday.
Is it time to look for another hill? A hill well grounded is always worth a climb. A ungrounded hill maybe just a pile of claggy clay, floating on nothing of substance, to which we get stuck and can't move.
'It is so hard to be nice when it hurts' -- sometimes it is necessary to tell it like it is. It isn't about being nice, so much, for anyone can be nice when they want to. There is much to be said for being honest to oneself, to one's feelings, and the integrity that genuine relationships demand.
It is good that we cry, the tears wash the heart and soul. My heart cries along with my friend in her grief, and in her loss of what was hoped might have been.
There is a new day, each day, ...
What are your wings doing now?
i believe that certain glories have no heat nor light when they are so far away. how can they? but i believe they have both heat and light when you get close enough...
caged, yes. but flown? no. i just can't.
what are my wings doing then? i don't know... testing their strength like a fledgling?
birds don't need wings in a cage. Perhaps it is time ot undo the catch.
I believe that the true glories has heat and light no matter where it is. True relationships transcend space and even time and temporal.
It is conversely true that untrue relationships can also drain and snuff-out, no matter whaere they are.
You will be surprised at how relaxed and refreshed you feel when you let go of that which cannot be held. The is nothing to loose but so much to gain -- you will even get yourself back.
The latch to the door is on the inside. Can you see it?
don't push me on this pete...
think me not so stupid that i commit myself to a cause without due reason. flying the cage sounds all very well, but that is merely because of the metaphor used.
there is another side to this. that of not giving up on things unduly, that of weathering the bad things rather than running away, that of being constant and true to your emotions...
I shall defer to your judgement and where you choose to remain.
There is a time for everything; to weather the storm or to run for cover. Each person chooses one or the other but the storm is what it is.
What you mean by being true to your emotions I do not follow, for I have found from my personal emotional expressions and both the observation and experince of others that emotions are the most fickle creatures.
oh i suppose what i mean is, yes, of course emotions are fickle creatures but almost everything in life is fickle; and emotions are important or perhaps inescapable, either way, they hold just as much sway over us as reason, if not more.
happiness is an emotion, and even if you lose it only after an hour or a day or a month, doesn't mean that the pursuit of it was in vain, or that you will not try again... thats how wonderful it is. if you didn't try, you wouldn't have anything.
love is an emotion. i'm sure you married your wife because you loved her, and even though you knew there was the possibility you would fall out of love, you took that risk.
i think you have to put your trust in untrustworthy things sometimes. i think you have to believe that things which can and will change won't ever change. because where would you be if you didn't? you would be so scared that it wouldn't last forever, that you would never experience something like happiness or love. emotions belong firmly in the present moment, in the ephemeral passing seconds, and the minute you try to view them in terms of the infinite, you are trying to change them into something they aren't.
how does this relate to everything? well... i think that if i feel something tender within myself it may be fickle but it's gorgeous while it lasts, and its certainly worth trusting it on the offchance it may last. also the mere experience of it teaches me to continue to seek it out in new places when it fades.
if i feel something tender, a tiny little green shoot growing inside me i will willingly test it against all the world can throw at it, and against the crushing hand of time, but there is no way i will kill it of my own accord.
It begs the questiion, then, why not pursue sadness, and see where it takes one, if emotions as a set are to be held in such high regard? But perhaps some people do so unknowingly, where sadness is disquised within still unmet expectations.
Emotions do present themselves in the present moment, just like acts of reasoning (and we should not think they function impartially or separately from each other), but the consequences of our responses to both emotion and reason demonstrates the reality of their eternal continuance.
Too much chocolate can make anyone sick. Still, some may continue eating chocolate to escape dealing with the harsh realities of a fickle world by making decisions, ones that cut across what they hope might be the preferred outcome of chocolate consumption.
Yes, it is all very convoluted and that is the point. It may not get any better until the circuit is broken. And that may have to happen despite the way we feel about loosing the hope of our desires.
But, maybe I am talking through my hat. Perhaps it is better for me not to comment at all, especially since I really am not privy to facts, just veiled nuances of this or that; but that is fine for nothing other than that has been promised, and reasonably so. Besides, who am I to offer anything that I think worthwhile, just because I think so.
It is difficult to move from allegory to actuality -- they shouldn't be mixed anymore than one should mix one's metaphors.
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